Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Top intelligent community

Dear Children of Kitchener-Waterloo,

I hate to break the news on you, but it's not the stork who brings the little babies. No, for about the price of a used car you can buy them frozen in a clinic near Toronto. Then you put them in your mommies tummy where they unfreeze and grow until they get too large... and that's where the story gets a bit unpleasant, but don't worry coz intelligent people are working on this.

(In the background of the photo: The old Seagram distillery in Waterloo, which now hosts the Centre for International Governance Innovation)


  1. Hi Bee.

    I guess this is clear evidence that science doesn’t always improve things, as before the cryogenic method one needed to recreate to procreate . Besides I always knew it couldn’t be the stork since otherwise today it would be handled by UPS:-)



  2. Uncle Al was a sperm donor at the University of California/Irvine/Medical Center/ Fertility Clinic. Being paid for piece work is not so bad... but the overtime could be brutal. Watch A Boy and His Dog before considering the electro-thingy.

  3. Hello Bee (and all),
    are there storks in North America?

  4. Anybody here watch "family guy" ?
    Here is the real deal with storks :


  5. I think they should replace the stork with geese. It might make so much more sense.

  6. Hi Luke,

    If the geese brought babies, Canada would soon be suffering from overpopulation.

    Anyway, I can basically see it in front of me, the top intelligent people sitting around over a couple of suggested sings depicting pregnant women. They scratch their heads and pad their bellies, wondering how somebody is supposed to distinguish fat from pregnant on these signs. Thus, they settle on the stork. Makes me wonder though, why didn't they just write down what they meant to say. For the one guy in a century who ends up in KW and who neither speaks English nor French and who mistakes a pregnant women for an overweight guy? Best,


  7. Actually, in which cultures does the White Stork actually "bring the babies"? That's not universal, I guess? It's common folklore in Germany and maybe most of Europe, but where else? We could make a poll, as we have readers from all over the world ;-)

    Cheers, Stefan

  8. "for about the price of a used car you can buy them frozen "

    Assuming that most people value their kids higher than their cars, this sounds like a bargain.

  9. Here I found some information on white storks.
    The story of storks bringing children
    originates from northern Germany,
    the link says.
    The migration behaviour seems to be
    (there is a population around Taschkent,
    which migrates to India)
    So, settlement of storks in North
    America might be possible.

  10. There is an old Yiddish joke about a Mohel (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mohel) who had a picture of a clock hanging outside his office.
    When he was asked-"Why do you have a picture of a clock?" he answered- "What would you like me to hang?"

  11. Now I know I was wrong. Storks really deliver babies.

  12. There's a top obstetrician called Dr. Travis Stork; Stork, on the reality show The Doctors (hence, real name.)
    PS1: Uncle Al, I am sure the World needs your superior Mensa genes ...
    PS2: Maybe someone should start a toxicology blog called "Badreaction."


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